Board Games

So, I played a board game today called Axis and Allies. It had a 40 page instuctional booklet. I think that's all I need to say. I have to be honest, I've never been a fan of board games. Even as a kid, I only owned Connect Four. I mean, I enjoy Risk every now and then, but it's not like I get up everyday and am like, "Man, I want to play Risk." But my friend bought Axis and Allies, so I said I would try it out with him. Well anyways, I found it so boring, and so drawn out, and just so irritatingly complicated, I left. And I felt bad about it, because I think I gave the impression to my friends that I didn't enjoy their presence. I do. I just don't like Axis and Allies. Partially, I think, it's because I was doing so poorly. But still, I don't know if I would have liked it if I was a good player. I don't know, I wouldn't recommend it. That took up a good part of my day. Once again, I did not do much tonight. I hung around at church, talked to Corey for a bit. Debated calling the swing girl again. And once again, didn't. I did get some good advice though, from the good people at Nike. Just do it. This is getting way too dramatic. Just call the freaking girl. I bought a book tonight entitled "The Gentleman's Guide to Style and Grooming." It's all about dressing like an old fashioned English gentleman, and being chivalric. Sort of. It has all these sections about suits, ties, hats, accessories, shoes, cigars, etc, etc, etc. It's interesting, but it irritates me how it has such a singular approach to fashion. Well, I suppose it is the "gentleman's" guide, not the "modern" guide. I enjoy it though. As I've said before, I do have a thing for fashion. Anyways, my mom is getting all angry at me because I said I might buy this Master Replicas lightsaber. I wish I could just be treated as an adult, and be allowed to make my own choices, and live with the consequences. I don't know, when I have kids, and they're in college, I hope I can let thim be a little more independent. If they want to spend however much on something, it's not my problem. And if they go broke doing it, it's not my problem either. So, there. I hope I can find stuff to do this week, I am really sick of just sitting at home. It will be worse now with my mother nagging at me. That is the part of summer I want to escape the most. I'm sick of always being nagged, be it to practice, or to not spend money, or to call my teacher, or whatever. I guess it goes with the territory. I hope college goes better this year, socially at least. You know another thing I'm sick of? People who brag to me because they have girlfriends. I really find this confusing, as I don't think the lack or having of a girlfriend is much of an indication of a person's worth. A lot of the people I admire the most, the most upright people I know do not have a significant other. It's just really stupid. So, I'm going to a wedding Friday. I really hope they play some swing at the reception.

Aggravation

I am aggravated. Aggravated partially with myself, partially with a friend of mine. Bottom line, I have been trying to get a hold of my best friend for the past 4-5 days, and he never calls me back, or anything. I don't know if he's pissed off at me or what, but I feel very cast aside. And I'm sure he'll read it, and get angry that I didn't talk to him first instead of writing in this thing, but I can't really tell him if he never calls me back or anything. So, there. The phone is a terrible invention. Anyways, I'm aggravated with myself, because it always seems like I have no one to do anything with. And it's partially my fault, because I never call anyone. I don't know, the phone just makes me nervous and such, and I always feel as if I'll intrude on all the cool stuff other people are doing. I don't know. It would help if people called me, but I've been known to myself, not return calls. This needs to stop, right now. People deserve open communication, and forthright answers. But anyways, yeah, I sat here for about 2 hours, and debated calling the swing girl. Then finally I say to myself, "Holy crap, you are making a stupid phone call to a friend to ask her to do something, a completely normal activity, into this completely ridiculous dramatic thing." Then of course, I called her, and no one was home. It sucked. I can't lie, I am prone to over-dramatizing things. And I need to work on stopping that. In other, happier news, I went biking today. Again. And it was fun. Holy crap, there was this intense wind, and I must have rode at least 6 miles straight into it. It sucked, but it was definitely hardcore. I had fun at work today. I enjoy working with Shane and Maegan. They are cool cats. Anyways, that's the dish. I'm watching Jerry Maguire. If any of you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it. It's from before Tom Cruise became a freak.

The Night

Well, it's 1:07 in the morning, and I work at 8. I went and saw Star Wars with one of my friends, so that was fun. I also went biking tonight. I have a goal to bike every day this weekend. It was a good ride. I almost tried calling the swing girl to come hang out tonight, or go see a movie, but then I decided I didn't want to come on quickly, or potentially twist her thoughts on how I feel about her. I don't know, hope she had a good night though. I work again tomorrow, but only for 6 hours this time. Better than the 8.5 I'm used to. Man, we took a funny video at work today, of me hitting our pharmacist with this big piece of plexiglass. I laughed so hard I cried. Man it was funny. I love our pharmacist, Shane. He's a great guy. Anyways, I'm tired. Have a good night everyone.

Swing Moves

Hello cyberspace denizens. Man, I learned some insane moves at swing tonight. And in the process, both fostered and strengthened my friendship with the girl. Anyways, I learned this really cool thing where the girl hops on your leg with her knees, then sits on your leg, flips and sits the other way, then kneels, then is off. Another one is this sweet move called Around the World, where I hold her up, flip her around and hold her around my back, then sort of flip her under and catch her again in front. So, she is just sort of thrown around my body. The one I'm most proud of however, is the backflip. I acquired the skill to, from a standing position, backflip the girl around my arm. Man, it is sweet. I didn't think I could do it, but my friend Ben encouraged me, and I actually did it. Hardcore. Man, it was sweet. I don't know, it was just a great night of dancing. Just great to get out and dance. I am going to hardcore miss this when I go back to Luther. The burden is set on Ben, Jacob, and I to continue the dance, and expand it at Luther. Anyways, so on to the more personal story set to the swing. So, I go to pick up the girl, and her German friend decided not to come, so it was basically just her. And man, I danced solely with her all night. It was just great. I mean, it's not like anything romantic happened. It was just a strengthening thing, and it rocked my world. I had a ton of fun with her. It just feels so good to be establishing something with her, and becoming friends. You know, I think I am realizing something about my attraction to her. Right now, all I want to do is get to know her. She just seems like a girl who has been through a lot, seen a lot, done a lot, and cannot be understood just by dancing. I don't know, I enjoy being with her, and want to get to know her. I think I've said that enough. Although, I did feel bad, because when some other female friends of mine showed up, I kind of neglected them, and that was not cool at all. That's the disadvantage to this. So many girls come, but when you're attracted to one, you just want to dance with them all night. But then, the other girls get left out, and don't have fun, and that sucks. Something to work on. Man, I learned some awesome moves. Man, I love swing dancing. I work tomorrow, crap. I wish I didn't have to. Oh well, it could be worse. At least I'll have enough cash to buy the Master Replicas limited edition Obi-Wan Kenobi lightsaber. Man, I hope it holds out long enough for me to purchase it. I need a centerpiece to my Star Wars collection. My enthusiasm for Star Wars has not dimmed. My tally for Revenge of the Sith is now at 9 in the theater. I hope to make it 10 by the end of the summer, as the film moves into second hand theaters and such. In other Star Wars news, the DVD for Episode III is out on November 1st, so everyone grab your Jedi robes and stormtrooper armor and start counting down. I can't wait to marathon all 6, plus the Clone Wars. It will rock, hardcore. Anyways, I'm out. You all have a good weekend.

Biking

I don't know if any of you engage in sport, or any other activity that involves physical exertion, but I am a biker. By that, I mean that I am the owner of a Trek 1500 road bike, a pair of 2003 Champs Elysees US Postal spandex biking shorts, and a US Postal jersey of the same fabric and kind. I also have Shimano shoes, Shimano pedels, a Giro helmet, Cat Eye glasses, Trek gloves, and Nike climbers socks. Climbing as in riding a bike up a hill, they're polka dotted. So basically, I have all the gear of a biker, but I am nowhere near good enough to be a real one. Real as in people who actually have the skill to ride long distances without dying. I do not ride my bike nearly as much as I would like to, or should. But I do enjoy it, the times I do get out. Anyway, so I went out today, and it was just great. Have any of you had an athletic experience where with every ounce of energy you put out, you can just feel yourself getting stronger, becoming more resilient, more powerful. That happened to me tonight. I went out a couple times this month before, and it wasn't so hot. The first time, I trashed myself. I foolishly thought I could take on some hills that I had no business on, not biking for probably 4 months or so. But this time, I took a route that included lots of hills, some pretty intense. And man, I dominated. It was hard, but I wasn't exhausted. Instead, I felt empowered. As a cyclist, my prime inspiration is of course, Lance Armstrong. That man, I just can't stand it. He's so awesome. Anyways, he talks about enjoying the pain of cycling. Tonight, I enjoyed it. The strain as my legs pumped just made me want to go faster and tackle the hills harder. It was just great, to get out in the fresh air, sweat, have the breeze on your face as you bike, and enjoy a beautiful night outside. Sometimes the best way to rejuvenate yourself is to climb into some spandex, hop on a bike, and pedal until you can't go any further. The way it was tonight, I felt I could have ridden a hundred miles. Anyways, tomorrow, we have work and swing dancing on the docket. I'm picking up the girl I've been thinking about, so hopefully I can capitalize a little better on any prospective opportunity. She's bringing her German exchange student, who she doesn't really like, so I hopefully I can spend a little bit more time with her. In any case, it will be fun. I always have fun swing dancing. I'm out, catch you all later.

Irony

So, today was a fairly uneventful day. I brought a friend to church for invite a friend day, and that went well. I think he had a good time. Then, I went to Target for a while, and went through some stuff with my dad, sat around, then went to a friend's house and just sort of sat there for a while. It was interesting, I thought. I was with people I have known practically since birth, but I felt very far away. And the whole time, I constantly had the swing dancing girl from the previous post on my mind. Here's the irony of the title. I actually called her house to ask her to do something, or whatever, and she's not there. The one time I really do call, and don't debate myself for a week, she's not there. You have to understand, when I picked up my date for prom, I waited outside her door for 3 minutes, because I was so nervous to ring the doorbell. I mean, she knew I was coming, I knew she knew I was coming, she knew it was a dance, so did I. But still, I got so nervous over something I shouldn't have been that nervous about. And I do that whenever I do something with the opposite gender, especially with people I am attracted to. But of course this time, when I just did it, she wasn't home. In the words of Vincent Vega, what a jip. Anyways, I'm looking to find some clothing to wear to this wedding I'm going to in about 2 weeks. I'm looking at the Bachrach site. You must understand, Bachrach is my preferred men's clothier. I love the clothing from that shop. If you are a male, and need to look good, go to www.bachrach.com. I don't know, I have a thing for fashion. It's one of my foils. When I do have a need to dress up and look respectable, I want to look stylish. Vain, I know, but what can you do? Probably just have enough will power to stop being so self centered. I can work on it. Anyways, so yeah. That was my day, in a nutshell. I've been thinking the past couple days that I want to do something exciting next summer. Like work at a camp or something. I have a friend who is a counselor at the Bible camp I frequented as a child. I used to dream of being a counselor there. They always seemed so cool. But I'm not so sure anymore. The camp has gotten so big, and corporate, and I don't know, I feel like the soul of the place has left. Possibly I should work to try and restore the spirit of the place I felt in my youth. Or maybe I've just outgrown it, that could be it. I don't know. I want to do something significant, but I don't want it to be selfish. Like, I don't want to work at a camp because I want to enhance my faith, or have people be envious of me, or posture around as a "cool" counselor. In all fairness, I'd probably be the weird eccentric counselor that only the kids like myself would enjoy. I don't know, I have this notion about myself that I would be good with older kids, especially intelligent ones. People who have a dry sense of humor. Anyways, yeah. I think it would be fun to just get out of the pharmacy for a summer, and create some new experiences. Do something where I can make a difference. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the pharmacy, for what it is. A job to give me spending money for college. Not something I want to do forever. Anyways, that's about it. Catch you all later.

Thursday, and the Benefits of Eccentricity

Today was an interesting day. I got up, went to a trombone lesson, which went well. Then, I drove to the church camp that I attended as a youth to just sort of chill and visit some friends who were there. That was fun. For the first time in a long while, I was able to be around a friend of mine and not get filled with romantic thoughts. So you know, that was very pleasing to me. I had a good time. It was a beautiful day, very sunny, but pretty hot. I thought it was a good day to experience the romance of the American road. I've heard that the only true way to experience America is by driving, and I believe it. I don't know, I find it almost relaxing to take a nice drive in the country. It was Thursday, so I went swinging at the caves. Swing dancing was fun tonight, but I am feeling myself limited in my moves. I need to master more styles. I need to practice the Charleston and Lindy, and get strong enough to do the sweet flips and stuff. Over the course of the night, I threw myself into some more personal turmoil. So, I have somewhat befriended the daughter of an adult I know, and invited her to come swing dancing. So, I don't know, I had talked with her a bit before, but I don't know, I just found myself super attracted to her tonight. She just seemed to be the sort of person that understood my personality. And she actually wasn't just shielded in tons of virtue or whatever, like so many girls I know. Not to say virtue is bad, but I don't know, I think a person should experience the world. Except when it comes to sex, which I am stricly wait until marriage, I'm for having a couple drinks or whatever. Although I can't lie, I'm not a fan of ciagarettes or tobacco at all. It's just lame. This girl seemed to indicate she had a smoke every now and then, which didn't impress me, but hey, we all have problems. Anyways, so I found myself super attracted to her. And when we get back, she asks if I want to come hang out with her and her friend at Perkins for a while. And like an idiot, I say no. I don't know, I wish I would have gone. I mean, it's not like she was asking me in a way that indicted she was attracted or anything, but still, it must have meant that my company was enjoyed in some rudimentary way. I had some dumb excuses for not going, that I had a headache (and I sort of did), that I had to practice the piano (which I did), and I did talk to a friend earlier about going to White Castle. It turns out, all I did was go play the damn piano for 15 minutes. When women that I find attractive invite me out, I need to seize the opportunity. It's a girl that I find really cool, and most of all, interesting. So many people are just not interesting. So, I don't know, I want to spend some time with her, befriend her and such. I realized something else tonight. I do not know how to take a girl out on a date. Or show interest in a woman that is romantic without being an idiot. I don't know. You walk a fine line between just going to a movie or going on a date. I think mainly, it's just me. I bet if a lot of guys would have taken a girl out to a movie, there are ways to show that indeed it is a date. I do not know these mysteries. I wish I did. I should like to take a girl on a date, a real one, with no alternate interpretations. I don't know, right now, I just really want to get to know this girl. It's been a while since I've met someone that I find so interesting, and fun to talk to. I don't know, I even sort of think this is the type of person that wouldn't mind watching Star Wars or something. I find myself most attracted to people who are a little eccentric. Eccentricity is what makes people interesting I think. Although, if you only look skin deep, it seems to make a person geeky, or awkward, or strange. If people would look at me skin deep, I think they would definitely see a Star Wars geek who had nothing better to do with his time. If one looked closer, they would wonder why Star Wars is so attractive, what drives this person, what sort of happiness does he glean from such an activity. Of course, you could use that on anything, be it the punk rock lifestyle, computer gamers, swing dancers, coin collectors, etc, etc, etc. Yeah, everyone interesting that I know has at least some quirks. Well, I still have more than a month of summer. Plenty of time for some friendship building. Hopefully it will go well.

My Life in Mid-July

So, back to the blog, I guess. Haven't posted in a while, but it's been pretty hum drum around here. It's been blazing hot here in Minnesota, so that has kind of sucked. I have been having fun in my Camaro, of which I have talked about earlier. Also, I don't know if I've discussed this before, but a group of my friends from college and high school have gotten into dancing. Swing dancing to be exact. We go every Thursday night, to these caves in St. Paul, which are actually a sort of dance hall. They have a big band, and a dance floor, and all these people come and swing. And holy crap, it is a buttload of fun. Like, all I can think about is dancing now. I want to practice moves, and learn new styles, and just go dance. I don't know, I find a certain joy in it that is very hard to explain. I just love the grace, and the "cool" factor. But, I don't think I go to be cool. I go because I love it. So, I took a girl out on a "date" to go see Revenge of the Sith tonight. I suppose it was a date, we both dressed up, I picked her up and paid for her ticket. I don't know, the girl situation is complex about now. Very hard to explain. It's like, all these women are swirling around me, and both are appealing in certain ways. It's very confusing, and I feel a lot of pressure upon me to be in a relationship. One of my good friends has recently acquired a girlfriend, and has become a bit consumed with her. That and the combination of other friends of mine in relatively stable relationships definitely has me feeling a certain sort of push. But you know, I don't know, it doesn't bother me really. This sounds terrible, but I'm not envious of my friend's relationships. I could never imagine myself in a relationship like they ones they are in. I don't know, it just seems so formal. Like, I want a girl who wants to discuss why Qui-Gon's ghost isn't in Episode III, or finds it enjoyable to go swing dancing and just look dumb, and not even care. I think I just need to focus on creating strong friendships with the females that I am interested in. A strong friendship is always the best foundation for anything, and plus, it just gives you that much more support and love. I don't know, in one situation, it's a girl that has had a past quite different from mine, in terms of experiences, and such. But I feel very strongly for her. But then again, she has her own boy situations. So, I don't know, I just want to be there for her right now, and not complicate her life further. I think that should be my motto. I just don't want to complicate things right now. And people give me crap for it, but whatever. Anyways, I've also been thinking a lot about old friends, and wondering how they're doing. I have a buddy working as a counselor at a church camp whom I haven't seen, so I've been wondering how she's been doing, and how the summer is, etc, etc, etc. I have lots of friends around here who just work all the freaking time, so I wonder how they are. I don't know, work is fine, and money is good, but if you get too caught up in it, it just sort of makes your life miserable. Anyways, I'm off to bed.

The Joy of Driving

Hello folks. I don't know how many of you have cars, or motorcycles, or any other sort of motorized transportation device, but I do. I drive (usually) a 1999 Oldsmobile Intrigue, which I just recently put a dent in by running into the side of the garage door. However, in the summer, I often drive a white 1985 Chevrolet Camaro, owned by my father. It is sort of an heirloom, at least, I consider it one. Anyways, I don't know how many of you have had the pleasure of driving a sports car, but if ever offered, please don't pass it up. And especially, please take advantage of any opportunity to drive a white 1985 Chevy Camaro. Because it is just the most fun I think you can have in a car. The thing really doesn't go that fast, doesn't have any cool additions, doesn't have AC, and can't even play a CD or tape. But really, it is just so much fun to drive. The open window, rumbling engine, the feel of the shifter in your right hand, the jolt when you accelerate, it is driving ecstasy. So, now you all know that. I am a little short on cash right now, and it doesn't help when I dented my car, so I'm a little stressed about that. The thing is, if I would just be frugal, I would not have these problems. I definitely need to curb my spending. I'll have a somewhat large paycheck coming on Friday though, so I can make it. But still, no excuse. I don't need to spend as much as I do. But I suppose, I've made some big purchases this past month, like a digital camera and a cell phone. Other than that, I've been pretty good. I spend a lot on movies though. That's an area I need to improve upon. So, it's Independence Day in about 10 minutes. I hope everyone has a pleasant Fourth, and takes a little time to think about all of the joys of this beautiful country, and those who are off protecting us abroad. Happy Independence Day everyone.